When I talk with others about things they are dealing with, I recognize there is a deep need to feel understood...to be heard. We want to be "known" and feel we are not alone. This is where the healing process starts, and some need to talk about their experience more than others. If someone you know keeps bringing something up, keeps trying to explain what they've been through, or seems to explain away their own emotional handicaps, that is an indicator that they are crying out to be understood. Yes, it may seem like they are complaining, that they aren't moving on, and you know you can't "fix it", but you can listen. It may take awhile depending on the nature and severity of their experience. Just as someone with a physical wound or illness needs comfort, patience and companionship as they heal, you can be there for someone in emotional pain. Often those wounds are even deeper and more painful than physical ones...even if you can't see them.
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